I’m Fine

Dear X,

I can’t endure your negativity in my life any longer. We’re a couple; you’re supposed to make me feel better not worse! Instead, you spend your time nagging and worrying about invented problems. It’s been getting on my nerves for too long.

So I passed out in a bar! It was a fun evening, I drank a little too much, that’s all! So it happened a few times – am I not allowed to have a good time out and quaff a few drinks? Yes, I have experimented with cocaine; so has 50% of the population and they’re all fine as well! It’s not addiction, it’s FUN, something you know nothing about. I hate to wake up to your worried gazes, your tears and your urging to change my lifestyle. How dare you suggest that I have any self-control problems?

Do I need to remind you who earns more money of the two of us? I’m fucking successful and I have the right to celebrate that! I work hard and I deserve some relaxation. The least thing I need is you telling me that I have an alcohol problem. Alcoholics are homeless people with bloated, red faces that piss their pants and are constantly broke. Do any of these things apply to me? No? See. I can’t be with someone who always sees problems everywhere, who can’t focus on the positive. I am doing perfectly fine and I’ll be doing just as fine without you.

Yours sincerely,


P.S.: Did I mention that I’m doing fine?



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