Author Archives: fabiamorger

Plagiarism. Or: An Honest Mistake.

Dramatis Personae:

Student (hereafter: S)

Professor (hereafter: P)

Setting: The professor’s office. The professor is sitting behind the desk reading through some papers. A knock on the door is heard.

P: Come in please!

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The Self-Involved Talker

Disclaimer: this text is not an academic treatise of a serious topic. So, if you complain about emotional and unreasonable arguing – “lavabo in innocentia manus meas”! Continue reading

Glad Tidings

Dear X,

You’re probably surprised that I’m sending you this break-up letter considering that you probably don’t even know my name. So, don’t you worry, this letter has really nothing to do with you. Truly: it isn’t you, it’s me.

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Platonic

Dear X,

I dream of a sexless world inhabited by a people without carnal urges. The human need to hump each other disgusts me. What makes us better than rabbits on the field whose primary life urge is to breed? Every romantic letter, every tender declaration of love is somehow linked to the fact that you want to get naked with someone else and get in touch with their genitals. How incredibly profane!

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Gladiators

Dear X,

It breaks my heart but I have to remove myself from our bond. And I have to do it now, while we are happy before we drift back into our spiral of boredom and rage. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done. But I know that in the long run it’s better than to be stuck in the dead thing that our relationship has become. Continue reading

Tear Down the Blindfolds!

Dear X,

This farce that you call a romantic relationship ends now. If you should feel shocked or grieved by this news I really don’t care.

You want to know the reason? Here it is: you’ve never loved me and I have too much self-respect to be with someone whose feelings are as insincere as yours are for me. I’m sure you’re completely dumbfounded now and really keen on talking me out of this folly. Don’t waste your breath.

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I’m Fine

Dear X,

I can’t endure your negativity in my life any longer. We’re a couple; you’re supposed to make me feel better not worse! Instead, you spend your time nagging and worrying about invented problems. It’s been getting on my nerves for too long. Continue reading